How do I get custody of my child?

My son is almost 9 months old now. His father has not been in his life, and can't support him financially even though we are still married. He has only seen my son a handful of times, and not once has bought anything for him. He has told me on many occasions that he wants to sign his rights over, however now he won't. How do I get custody of my child? We are not divorced and I am considering that too.
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